Day +100
So yesterday was Day +100 since my Stem Cell Transplant. I had it marked on the calendar and everything and totally forgot (until today). 
I guess that is a good thing.
We were sitting in the living room watching TV and Carrie says, “I need to ask you something.” I am thinking … uh-oh what did I do? She asked me if I thought the lymphoma was back. I just looked at her and said I really try not to dwell on it, but yeah I think I do.
She said she wondered, because my demeanor has changed over the last few days. I am trying to stay positive everyday, but I just have this feeling that something is not right. It’s the same feeling I had just before the relapse (October 2004) and the same feeling I had just before my initial diagnosis (June 2003).
My next appointment with Dr. Freidberg is not until May 24. I am hoping this is just exhaustion and not the Lymphoma. I have been tired and exhausted from the SCT & Radiation, but this is different. I had one night of night sweats last week too, but that has not happened again so I am not putting much weight on that.
I am losing weight too, but I think this is just because I am worried and sometimes too tired to cook for myself. I am currently down 4 lbs to 174. I was 195 before my relapse in Oct 2004 and 215 before my initial diagnosis in June 2003. So it has me a little worried that I have not put the weight back on though. Although I am liking the skinnier me.
So I don’t think I am spiraling down into depression. I think I am just making realistic observations on what my body is telling me.
I also wanted to add that to date I have raised $4,207.00 for the Lance Armstrong Foundation. My wife and I (and several friends) will be at the Williamson Apple Blossom Festival this year - May 19-22, 2005. We should have a booth and we will be marching in the parade!
